You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
