Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
You dont lie about slip and slides
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
