god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
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