Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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