If i come over, it means nothing
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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