Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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