I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
