Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize