People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
