she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize