Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
