This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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