if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
