Im at strip club and am horny
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
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There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
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Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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