He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
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I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
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It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Text me some of your sweat
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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