I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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