She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
