They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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