I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize