i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Randomize
