Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert

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  (586): I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert http://tfl.nu/fz38
  Replies (2) Good night (699) Bad night (912)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.

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  (865): Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet. http://tfl.nu/z1qf
  Replies (8) Good night (3429) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.

  (1-406): View more from Montana

  haha i know

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  (406): i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt. (1-406): haha i know http://tfl.nu/vo1w
  Replies (21) Good night (7738) Bad night (1228)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic

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  (845): you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic http://tfl.nu/aiqs
  Replies (4) Good night (2451) Bad night (591)
• Favorite

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.

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  (204): You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/qhl9
  Replies (3) Good night (1702) Bad night (982)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years

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  (425): we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years http://tfl.nu/w11g
  Replies (2) Good night (1209) Bad night (555)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.

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  (724): I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now. http://tfl.nu/lvrq
  Replies (5) Good night (2186) Bad night (580)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  The air was thick with penises

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  (805): The air was thick with penises http://tfl.nu/1iew
  Replies (4) Good night (1292) Bad night (591)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.

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  (517): Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals. http://tfl.nu/q6vr
  Replies (12) Good night (1104) Bad night (585)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.

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  (919): We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad. http://tfl.nu/qk8s
  Replies (6) Good night (1836) Bad night (353)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.

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  (817): Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong. http://tfl.nu/ru69
  Replies (1) Good night (406) Bad night (263)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  No piss test, hell yeah

  (248): View more from Michigan

  FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.

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  (248): No piss test, hell yeah (248): FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS. http://tfl.nu/hck1
  Replies (3) Good night (505) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.

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  (701): Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy. http://tfl.nu/7jm2
  Replies (2) Good night (345) Bad night (828)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could

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  (330): That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could http://tfl.nu/draz
  Replies (2) Good night (366) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.

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  (310): Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley. http://tfl.nu/mbvo
  Replies (2) Good night (317) Bad night (619)

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