This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Randomize
