so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
