Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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