I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
