You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
