I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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