the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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