She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
