I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
