My liver just broke up with me...
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize