Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Randomize
