do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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