Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I'm passing your future prison.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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