Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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