Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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