Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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