Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
