So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I just want nice things and good sex
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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