In America we eat man semen.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
