there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize