i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
