woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize