Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize