Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
