paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
