How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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