google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
