how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
