have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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